


Won't Let You Go

by itneverleftyou



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-08
Updated: 2013-11-08
Packaged: 2017-12-31 20:27:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1036034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itneverleftyou/pseuds/itneverleftyou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He knows that Stiles is on the edge these days because of school and the assignments piling up. He knows that the distance doesn't help. He knows that sometimes he says the wrong things but he doesn't understand this new thing. Fighting with Stiles. Sure, they've bickered, couples do that. And since kissing Stiles on a dare in Junior year, they only did the cute bickering. They've had disagreements and always talked things out but in the past few weeks, every phone call, every Skype session has turned into near yelling matches...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Won't Let You Go

"I don't know what you want from me, Stiles," he means for it to come out with a bite, to show how he's feeling deep within his stomach but it only comes out in a quiet whisper, a knock of air like he's been kicked in the chest. They've never fought like this, and he knows that things are tense. He knows that Stiles is on the edge these days because of school and the assignments piling up. He knows that the distance doesn't help. He knows that sometimes he says the wrong things but he doesn't understand this new thing. Fighting with Stiles. Sure, they've bickered, couples do that. And since kissing Stiles on a dare in Junior year, they only did the cute bickering. They've had disagreements and always talked things out but in the past few weeks, every phone call, every Skype session has turned into near yelling matches and it's left him with an ache in his entire being.

 

The line is silent and he pulls his phone from his ear, his whole body coming to a stop as he checks if Stiles has hung up. He hasn't and Isaac puts the phone back to his ear, sighing softly. "Please, just talk to me."

 

A bitter laugh meets his ear and he bites his lip, scrubbing his free hand over his face in frustration but keeps quiet as Stiles sighs. "I can't talk to you like this. You're like, not even here. I hate talking on the phone, through computer screens. I."

 

"Is it the distance?" He has to ask, has to cut his boyfriend off before he yacks right there in the middle of the grocery store. "Because I'll transfer, Stiles. I'll come visit more. We can visit more. We can... we can get an apartment. I know how much you hate the dorms."

 

He laughs again and it's not the laugh that Isaac knows or loves. "That's. That's not even realistic, Isaac. You can't do that. You can't change your dreams for me and I can't change mine for you and we can't pretend we won't grow bitter if either of us give up our school of choice and I can't. I'm not. You can't just give up your life for me!"

 

He knows well enough to know that Stiles is moments away from a panic attack and he feels like sliding down to the floor, he longs to cover himself in his blanket because he's used to being there for Stiles. To hold him in his arms and rock him through the things that break him apart in times of high stress. He remembers doing it in their senior year, kissing his forehead and rocking Stiles until he could breathe properly. "So what do yo-" He breaks off, his mouth going dry as he swallows thickly and feels like he's chewed on needles. "Wait. Are... are you breaking up with me?"

 

It's silent and that makes him leave his cart in the middle of the way as he quickly makes his way out of the store. He doesn't care. He makes it to his car before he allows himself to process this. Junior year, they became closer friends. Texting and hanging out, even without Scott and exchanging notes. Stiles proof-reading his essay's, Isaac helping him with lacrosse. Stupidly, neither of them saw it but the pack did. He just saw Stiles as a good friend, possibly his best friend while knowing he'd always be second to Scott but he didn't mind, especially when Stiles would smile at him. It wasn't until they were dared to kiss, a lame attempt at entertainment on a random Saturday night when it was storming and the power went out. It wasn't until he felt the butterflies and saw the blush spread across his friend's cheek that he realized something was even there.

 

And now he's going to lose it. He can feel it and he doesn't know how to hold on or how to make it stop. He doesn't know anything without Stiles now. The boy who swooped into his life with one-liners and puns that always had him doubled over in silent laughter and sometimes able to coax a belly laugh out of him. Stiles, who held him when he broke down on the anniversary of his father's death because he understood. Stiles, who helped him take flowers to the graves and him helping in return, meeting Stiles' mom four months into dating and he still remembers the way his stomach felt when Stiles touched the headstone, a smile tugging at his lips as he whispered that he might already be in love Isaac.

 

"Is it someone else?" He bites out, because why else? Nothing's adding up right now and he needs answers, needs to know.

 

"God, no. And I. I don't want to break up. Why, do... you?"

 

Isaac wipes angrily at his eyes, hating that he's stuck in his car in California and Stiles is in New York and that things are like this. That it hurts. That it aches so badly and he can't breathe and he can't deal with the fighting. He hasn't slept well since their last visit and he needs Stiles. Needs him like he needs air but the boy won't let him move, transfer. "You're an idiot if you think I want that." He says finally, sniffling quietly and he can almost feel the change immediately.

 

"I'm. I'm sorry, okay? I miss you and everything just."

 

"Sucks?"

 

" _Majorly_. And I'm still getting used to not having you with me. You'd think I'd be used to it by now. It's like, November now and I'm still having issues being away from my boyfriend and my dad and all of my friends and I'm all alone out here and it's no excuse. I just thought if I pushed hard enough, you would just. Leave. And I wouldn't have to worry. I could try to get over it. But I'm dumb. I'm so fucking dumb, Isaac. I would never be able to. I want the house we talked about. I want that, and the kids and the stupid white fence and the ugly mini van. I want those things. I'm just, I'm scared. How am I supposed to do this for four years? How am I supposed to be here while you're there?"

 

Isaac breathes in, unsure of what to say or how to comfort his boyfriend. All he can feel is relief that this isn't ending, that he isn't losing Stiles. But he wonders how much longer will he have him, and it's not a good feeling. "We visit more. Are you coming home for Thanksgiving?"

 

"I can't, I have so much work. But I'll definitely be home for Christmas. Once I catch up, it'll be fine." His voice sounds guilty but Isaac can't figure out why. Almost as if reading his mind, Stiles sighs. "I put off an entire week of work because I was down in the dumps and spent the week in bed with ice cream. And before you say it, you can't come see me because I'll never get anything done. But Christmas. I'm there, I swear. And I'll make it up to you, all of this. Me being a jerk, me not being there..."

 

Stiles' voice is soft and Isaac closes his eyes to pretend the other boy is pressed against him, mouth against his ear as he speaks. It almost works. "You don't have to make it up to me, Stiles, just don't... don't scare me like that again. I swear to god, I thought you were going to break up with me."

 

"That's not going to happen." He says but it sounds like a promise. He hopes that it's a promise. "I'm not going anywhere." Isaac knows that he can reject it, tell him that it he thought about it but instead, he decides to have some faith. He can tell it's the truth, but he knows nothing is ever certain. But he's certain that the two of them love one another and it's going to have to be enough. It'll just have to be enough and Isaac swears to himself then and there that he won't let go without a fight, he'll do whatever he has to to ensure he and Stiles have the life they planned about in the dead of the night in tiny and sweet whispers so many times.

 

"I love you," He mumbles out, his eyes still closed.

 

"I love you, Isaac." Stiles breathes back and something inside of him just knows they'll be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> I was feeling slightly angsty when I wrote this, so I hope it's okay and that it doesn't suck too horribly? My [tumblr](http://orgetagrip.tumblr.com/) if you're interested.


End file.
